The Mature Provider
13/02/2021Say My Name – The Dangers of the Hotel Lobby
16/05/2022Leading a double life can be equally exciting and exhausting. It’s often fun going on dates and meeting new people however juggling seeing clients with other commitments plus making time for yourself can take it’s toll.
Personally, I love working independently but there is a lot of time consuming work which goes on behind the scenes: marketing, answering emails, accounting, answering emails, social media, answering emails, photoshoots and more emails…and that’s not including getting ready and traveling to bookings!
It is lovely to spend time with respectful clients but, as with any industry, dealing with unfriendly customers can be tough.
It can be easy to get overwhelmed with it all and the importance of selfcare should not be underestimated.
Here are a few tips to avoid burnout which I find helpful and hopefully you will too:
- Set clear boundaries. Doing things which you don’t enjoy can be exhausting so make it clear what you are and are not comfortable with. Don’t let clients over stay or hassle you for free attention when you aren’t together. If you feel a client is draining your energy and you can afford to stop seeing him then do.
- Do something for YOU every day. Sex work can feel like a constant performance for others but keep burning that candle and soon you will have nothing left to give. Simple things such as going for a walk, reading a book or cooking a nice meal can help you feel grounded.
- Make a plan to manage your time. Set aside days and times when you are available to take bookings, put a few hours in the diary to focus on admin and schedule a time each day to answer messages. When the scheduled time is over be strict with yourself: turn off your laptop, put your phone away and focus on something else.
- Setting up a contact form, auto response for messages and scheduling social media posts in advance can be real time savers. The less time you spend on admin the more time you have for yourself.
- Have a separate work phone which you can switch off when you are on a break.
- Eat and sleep. It sounds so simple but when we feel stressed and overwhelmed it’s easy to forget the basics of self care. It really is amazing what wonders a balanced diet and 8 hours sleep can do for both our physical and mental health.
- Avoid negativity. Don’t look at punting forums- the degrading comments on these sites can damage your self-esteem. Similarly, if you receive rude or negative messages then block the number. None of this is worth stressing over, for every jealous person who puts you down there will be plenty of others who admire and respect you.
- Find something which makes you happy- it could be art, sport, music, spending time with family etc Having something positive to focus on when you are starting to feel burnt out can be really helpful.
- Take breaks. Understandably saying no to bookings is difficult, especially if you need the money, but if you can afford to take a day off then do. You don’t need to go on a luxury holiday – just resting at home can restore your energy and help you to feel revitalised.
Taking care of yourself can sometimes feel like a chore but consider it a wise business move. If you are feeling refreshed and happy you will attract regular clients and gain a positive reputation. The best investment you can make in this industry is in yourself and if you can avoid burnout then you are guaranteed to be more successful in the long run.
Alissa xx